Friday, September 18, 2009

After the breakup...

"Time is the greatest healer", someone either suffered a heartbreak and then recovered to write this line or probably saw too many sad-faces to come up with a line like this. I for sure believe Time is as much as too be blamed for all the pain we recieve as we give it credit for healing.

Hi, I am Rahul and this is my story.

My friends and my enemies together told me (yes I keep in close touch with my enemies) that Time will fix all the stuff. When Anjali questioned my love and to asked me to justify how I will make sure our love doesn't fail under the norms of our society, I cave in. She asked me lot of questions:
- How do we make our living?
- How do we raise our kids?
- How do we move away from our current life and lead a disjoint, lonely life?
& above all
- How do we leave our Parents?

To all I was able to answer in peace that if under our society and its guideline, a inter-religious unison will never be accepted, we better move to higher living standard. We avoid such conversations and we become pillars to support each other through tough time. For the first time we both were happy to be rebels. We both knew, how important each other company was. We knew the answer to one person's problem is the companionship of other.

But with time we realize and may be mature that leaving our Parents is neither in the limit of us - feeble mortals or in our God-send love. God himself created these two entites: Blood-relation and mutual-love. Somehow the human harmony only exists if both go hand-in-hand.

This fateful axe fell on both of us and we found time after breakup far more hard than actually fighting for our relationship, with society, our own notions and lot more. Like an infant always knowing her/his mother will be around, we knew the other is always a call away or may be a day's journey away. We were, as I see right to be named, Orphans-of-Love.

How does one find the foster home? Or actually find parents with same care and same touch (yeah well, touch of a companion can't be expressed in words : still I may try). Anjali's care was wierd in many sense. When she will meet me her hands will go Icy-cold, even in hot-delhi summer. But it still shows the care, isn't it.

We talked once almost after 3 months of separation. She told me tears are not friends which will lighten your heart full of sorrow. They just screw up the eyes and leave dark circles. I said she is stupid and should take care of her health. Even as orphans, we knew the love or the subtle mean of it.

Then almost 6 months passed away and as usual my work became my Gaurdian. Helping me through some rough patches. Everyone hates monday mornings and I became scared of friday evenings. Always sending a puppy-cry to my manager on Friday for more work, to prevent ideal days. Food lost its importance. Music became cries and Lyrics turned to dark corners of the past.

9 month celebration was a blast as one of the her friend finally spilled the beans, she is getting married. For the first time a casual beer drinking washed away thoughts with tower of cans. But still nothing changed, nights means more nightmares, work was comforting, friends were few.

What actually time did to us? Healed us? In what ways, leaving a scare never to be healed again? I fail to see why any one said "Time is the greatest healer". Time is a machine which makes catalog of snapshots of all the good and bad times and never forgets to remind us about the bad times when slightest of wind with thoughts of past pass by.

1yr anniversary is round the corner...I see no reason why I shouldn't go out and celebrate the failure of our love that we console each other to take different path, the breakdown of our system when our education taught us to be secular and our parents denied mere existance of human-being belonging of different religion...

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"From the author's diary"
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An hour conversation with my friend gave me insight to how human-beings build life surrounding with different rules; bending them to feel comfortable. This is his story or should I say this is his heart. Wanted to say what ever abstract he said.
I also know the girl, I have been touch with her till the point she asked me not to be her friend any more. After all we met through Rahul. I saw her in the Church where she was getting married, I saw her in the white dress and I saw her going away in a car...She was content and I only hope she was/is/will-be happy.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Hi dear,

I also don't know why people say "Time is the greatest healer", the only good thing it does, is that it passes by. With every yr u celebrate anniversaries, u don't forget a thing, just that with time lots of other people become part of ur life, leaving u with less and less time to think about...but believe me whenever u get time, u go back again and revisit those precious moments and thereby the life goes on.

-Didi

AK said...

How true :) we think so alike didi...

Unknown said...

Watta Heartfelt narration...

I envy you and every one who can so beautifully pen down there thoughts/ feelings :)

btw my stand is that time does not heal but surely to a large extend lessens the pain .